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Thursday, April 27, 2006

Showing Up In Gas Guzzlers To Debate Gas Prices

"Since George Bush and Dick Cheney took over as president and vice president, gas prices have doubled!" charged Sen. Barbara Boxer (D-Calif.), standing at an Exxon station on Capitol Hill where regular unleaded hit $3.10. "They are too cozy with the oil industry."

She then hopped in a waiting Chrysler LHS (18 mpg) -- even though her Senate office was only a block away.

Sen. Charles Schumer (D-N.Y.) used a Hyundai Elantra to take the one-block journey to and from the gas-station news conference. He posed in front of the fuel prices and gave them a thumbs-down. "Get tough on big oil!" he demanded of the Bush administration.

At about the same time, House Republicans were meeting in the Capitol for their weekly caucus (Topic A: gas). The House driveway was jammed with cars, many idling, including eight Chevrolet Suburbans (14 mpg).

Sen. John Sununu (R-N.H.) hopped in a GMC Yukon (14 mpg). Sen. Jim DeMint (R-S.C.) climbed aboard a Nissan Pathfinder (15). Sen. Ben Nelson (D-Neb.) stepped into an eight-cylinder Ford Explorer (14). Sen. Dianne Feinstein (D-Calif.) disappeared into a Lincoln Town Car (17). Sen. Edward Kennedy (D-Mass.) met up with an idling Chrysler minivan (18).

Next came Sen. Bob Menendez (D-N.J.), greeted by a Ford Explorer XLT. On the Senate floor Tuesday, Menendez had complained that Bush "remains opposed to higher fuel-efficiency standards."

Also waiting: three Suburbans, a Nissan Armada V8, two Cadillacs and a Lexus. The greenest senator was Richard Lugar (R-Ind.), who was picked up by his hybrid Toyota Prius (60 mpg), at quadruple the fuel efficiency of his Indiana counterpart Evan Bayh (D), who was met by a Dodge Durango V8 (14).

Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) emerged from the lunch looking for his ride when he spied The Washington Post's Shailagh Murray. Reconsidering, he set out on foot. "I need the exercise," he reasoned.

Wash. Post

I have an idea for a new bill....

Part One:Nobody is allowed to run for public office who makes more than twice what the average American makes in a year.

Part Two: The annual salary of a congressperson or senator shall not exceed 3 times what the average American makes in a year.

Part Three: Anybody who has served as a congressperson or senator may not serve as a registered lobbyist, or be employed by a lobbyist in any capacity upon retirement.

3 Comments:

Blogger Matt Vella said...

I see the people commuting to and from work in their ridiculous Escalades and Hummers and Expiditions.

Ya'll should have known what you were getting into when you bought a car that's as big as an armored personnel carrier.

6:50 PM  
Blogger Senor said...

I drive an Expedition. But I usually have about 10 boxes of sinks and faucets in it. Couldnt live with out it but I dont like the 17.4 mpg I get.
Luckily, I havent had to pay for gas since I moved here.

9:39 PM  
Blogger Matt Vella said...

That's work related, especially if you haul shit around.

I see women that can barely see over the steering wheel driving 30 miles each way every day. Dudes driving the same distance in monstrous fucking Escalades with the 20 inch rims. Clearly not a kid mobile, and even if it is, why commute in it?

It's the 70s all over again.

9:44 PM  

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